Shalom fellow acquaintances,
It has been a long or should I say short and fast month of grueling papers. Something to be thankful for, I'm done, I'm over it, I'm settled, I'm Finish! Yeah, like how the saying goes, there is a season for everything, a season to sow and reap, a season for toils and disaster, and a season for rejoicing and joy. As one season passes, then comes another. I close the one chapter of life right this moment. I'm filled with mixed feelings. Truly, no one would ever forsee how things would turn out. Firstly, TUN BERAIM BAPA, secondly, K-EKONOMI, thirdly, KESEIMBANGAN DAYA, fourtly, HALIA, and last but not least, DNA!?!?!... SPM candidates would SURELY relate with the certain topics mentioned. But what is pass HAS PAST. Held my head up high, glimmed a smile and I shashayed my way out the open doors. Dewan Berjaya never seemed so airry during Leo events but during the SPM, it was blowing with winds up to a 1000 miles and hour.
I took some time to look at the stage during a paper. I couldn't believe that I had actually performed several times on that stage. A privilege and a priceless experience. I don't want to sound all "studious" and "nerdy" now, but I'm seriously wondering what I would be doing every night now. Sharp at 2000 Hours I would make my way upstairs to my bed and grab a book or two and start doing my stuff till late, like really late. But anyway, honestly, the results, I'm surrendering it all to God. I've done my part, a very small part and now I'm totally surrendering it all to him no matter what the outcome.
Time has it's funny ways of teaching us lessons.
GROWING in time has always been a drag for some people. The moment some people touch their 20's they start complaining each year going on to describe how many strands of snow white hair has popped out from their scalps. Honestly, I hate those comments. HATE it. Hahaha. Being dead honest. I don't see the horror of growing old or maybe just not yet. But for all I remember I had always wanted to be old. Ok, maybe the factor of humans being unthankful is played in here. When they are young, they want to be old, when they are old, they want to be young. Like, WAT THE HELL?!..But the process of GROWING in time has been, a bliss. Ok, maybe not, but you can't really put your finger to it when you really mature if you get what I mean? Before you know it, you've grown, you know? Yeah, you know.
WAITING in time has been the worst. Think back on those times where you've learned lessons through waiting. Waiting in silence. Waiting in darkness and fear. Humans have always been insecure from the brink of time. Adam and Eve were ashamed of their nakedness and confusion kicked in. We've always wanted to know the way, the plans, and the ultimate goal but never realising that we might have missed out the important lessons in life through the process of waiting. It kills to wait right? I've seen many IMPATIENT ones leaving the hall SO frequently that it irritated a few of us. But the worst is waiting for a time to pass. Waiting for an answer, for an uncertainty to be certified. We always look for the right answer. When we're waiting for the bus, we wait for the time the bus will arrive. When we're waiting for the TV Programme Desire:Table for Three, we wait for the right time it starts. Get my point here? Na, me neither, but point is, WE WAIT. (Duh~~)
RISING in time has been the ultimate goal. We fail in time don't we. Excuse is, we needed more time. But time is a fragment, a piece, a link, and probably the most priceless possesion one can ever have. So the time you pour into what ever you are absorbed in is where your heart's possesion lay. Whether it be your friends, studies, TV, porn or playing tennis, if you spend TIME there, well, may I say that there is your priority. Point is, WITH the time we spend in our priorities, are we RISING in it? Are we benefitting in it? Are we growing through it? Are we finding direction and purpose in it? I still remember extremely clearly about 2/3 years back, when I was still assisting
Angeline Teh in the SS2 Secondary Cell then, she more or less repremanded me for i-can't-remember-what. But the thing that spoke to me till today from that verse she used was something I live to do now. "
Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial". You bet, EVERYTHING IS PERMISSIBLE, like hell-yeah EVERYTHING..... BUT... BUT.. BUT.. BUT.. is EVERYTHING beneficial?
I guess the course of time has thought me tons. I would like to claim that I have came out victoriously from each experience but unfortunately I can't. I have made TONS and TONS of mistakes. But we can fail a 1,000,000,000 times but only succeed Once, isn't it? It aint over, I'm only at Fail no-21872349. Teach me. Teach me. Thats all I require. Teach me, Time.
Fact is, it is so easy to point out the failures in life, my regrets, my pain and scar but why? Why look at those when I can look forward. Don't like this philosophy? Live with it sucker! If you ain't looking forward, you can only be looking backwards. Boy, I can count with one hand how many of you would actually read till this line.
Here it is again. A crossroad. Probably the first of the many huge crossroads in life now. I'm faced with a dilemma for college. Help me with this. There are 2 scenarios. Choose the best.
Scenario A - ProgrammeChoice 1 : American Degree Programme (ADP)Pros : Yeap, college. ADP. Why ADP? ADP allows me to take a diversified variety of subjects at a time. I will be able to do Drama, Psychology and even Biology while pursuing a business course with Communications, Specialist Mathematics and Economics. Get the picture? HUGE variety all at one point.
Cons : The ADP is a very FREEEE programme and I hate it! I hate living without direction or purpose everyday. I will have too much free time at hand and I hate it. (Sorry for sounding so errr hardworking?). Anothing this is that very few Australian Unis or UK Unis recognise the ADP except the USA. That would mean, I would HAVE to go the the States.
Choice 2 : South Australian Matriculation (SAM)Pros : I won't have much free time conpared to ADP. Though I think it would waive on me through time, but for now, being free isn't an option. SAM is also WIDELY recognise in Australia and especially when I'm vying for Melbourne U.
Cons : Apparently, it can get quite hectic and academic. Constant hardwork and effort must be added to the pot to score well. Note: Entry for most Degree courses in Melbourne U requires an average of >80. Medical at Melbourne U is 99!!! A whopping 99!
Scenario B - Time of EntryChoice A : JanuaryPros : I wont waste anytime. I would touch down from Japan on the 6th of January and for ADP it starts on the 8th and 3rd for SAM both at Taylors. School would start immediately.
Cons : It might be a bit heavy for my body right after the month long trip in Japan. I would also be late for SAM for the first few days which are crucial for new friendships and cliques to form.
Choice B MarchPros : I can join
Benjo after his NS. We would go in college together though he has no idea what he wants to do. During the mean time, I was thinking of following my youth pastor, Ps. Julie on her hospital trips and even a missions trip to Indonesia in January. I would have time on my hand and I could even work in February to earn some bucks.
Cons : I would be on express class for SAM and a rush programme la. I would be late 1 whole term for ADP. In short, I'll be slow for no apparent reason just for missing the January intake.
So hows? Help me decide? I have got 11 days to decide. I will have to apply for college like, NOW if I want to go for January.
So yet again,
John has loads of worries and thoughts on the back of his mind, but I can manage it. Life is full of decision making. Weeeeee... Seriously, anyone having a course on Decision Making in Life? I want to attend! But then again, we have sermons all through out the year.
Boy boy, one long post. Before I leave, I must say something. To all my friends, especially the ones in Form 5 and leaving,
Au Revoir, Bon Voyage, Sayonara, Take care. My prayers are with you. Truly, I wish all the best to all my friends. I hold each and everyone of you dearly and closely to my heart. As we go our separate ways, I do hope our roots will always remain the same. So spread your wings and fly now. Fly high and touch the sky and stop not at the clouds but aim for the sun. Loving you all. Special shoutout to
Poh Lynn who will be leaving soon, I've always like you as a person. You've steadfast on your principles and that is what is gonna bring you far in life. Cheers to you.
Ahh, how relieve after the long break. Watch out for more updates! Weee.. till then, I leave you with more pics. Oh and my first host will be in
Himegi, Hyogo which is near
Osaka. Map enclosed. Love ya'll!!!
With Love,
-jOhN "enjoying" LiM-
Past few days have been rather hectic. Got back from H.U.G.E in Melaka from loads of fun. Even though I only had spend one night over there, I did bond so much with my roommates. Lame-ass people. Sorry Vinz for the pranks :P Gonna miss ya Steven, Damn, I will have to wait another year to meet ya again. But all is good. Had a great time in the presence of God just ending it right with Him. Enjoyed a long talk with Grace before she leaves for National Service, disturbed Vincent till 3am just talking, found a new Aussie-accent friend Steven, and sang my heart out with Psallo. I'm glad I made the trip down.
